Today, my name is Silence.

Don't talk. Just listen.
I hate that people rarely ever listen and I'm not talking about being stubborn. In many cases it's better to just stop talking and listen to your surroundings. Feel the air, take a breath and relax. I know too many people who are too stupid to see something that's happening right before their eyes because all they do is talk. Stop getting caught up in the world and really take some time out to notice whats going around you.
Why must you concern yourself with the latest gossip? Stop being so fucking nosey and move away from it. That's how people get themselves caught up in bullshit that has nothing to do with them. - Hear no evil.
I know it's funny as hell to look at people sex tapes and various other forms of people getting exposed and embarrassed, but stay out of it. - See no evil.
Last but not least.. S T O P T H E F U C K I N G B U L L S H I T. Why do people find that it's their place to inform who ever of what ever they hear and see? I don't understand it. Leave people alone*.. lol. Got damn! - Speak no evil.

*F.Y.I for you fuckers, I don't talk people's business. I make fun of them. There's a difference. For instance, there's this chick [who will remain nameless] and she reminds me of Beetlejuice.
Ughh... I wonder if water will fix that.

Today, my name is Pin Up.

While I was in the shower today, I was thinking about how much I would love to be a pin up girl. Cartoon or no, those women are just.. amazing. I would love to wake up looking like a pin up girl everyday. lol. My life is such an era wreck. I really think I was born in the wrong decade. Most of the time, I'm a modern day hippie. If I had the chance, I would go to vintage stores and buy them out. I love the look. BACK TO THE PIN UPS. They have like, perfect bodies and their pictures and poses are too cool for school.

If I wasn't so self conscious, I would've been a model ages ago. I guess you can say I'm afraid of attention. YES, me. Afraid of too much attention. I can't stand a whole bunch of people just staring at me. Gets me feelin creeped out.
I want the perfect rack! Ok, lemme take that back. Not perfect, but near perfect lol. I wish my legs weren't so long sometimes.. ARGH!
Meh, we'll see how it goes though... I mean.. If my dear, old friend Matthew (direct link to his website - http://www.designyoursoul.com/) ever wanted to make me into a pin up girl, by all means he can have all the time necessary needed to do so =).

Today, my name is BADDAOW!!!

Yeah so, the title has nothing at all to do with my subject [just an F.Y.I].
I just wanted to write something briefly that comes up in everyday conversation.
'Mouse, why are you so different?' Why are you all the same? Why do you follow fads, and conform to the things you see in the media? I find it fucking hilarious when I see/hear people saying that they're different but yet I see these chicks rocking the same shit - multicoloured weave, gold jewellery, skinnies and Jordans/flats. I walk around (I'm talkin shit, I don't walk anywhere except to and from the car) seeing these guys in their white v-necks, tatted up like Weezy lookin like the ghetto New Boyz. Come on people. Stop buying into these things that you see on TV. Try something different. Stop going to the same damn club every Saturday - from when you can go to a club and the people working there know your name or can say 'Hey, weren't you here last week?' you know that you need to find better things to do with your time.
*sigh* I don't mean to dog anyone, all I'm trying to say is try something new. I look at these people and they're like carbon copies. It's just ri-fucking-diculous!! And I'm OUT!

Today, my name is Linkin Park.

Nuummmbbbbbbbbbb.. lol. Sizzurp is da shit mannnn. My body is you know.. Like.. Kinda numb-ish. I like this. I like being away from the world. There are wayyyy too many problems on earth to be here 24/7 365. I just need a rest sometimes. Alcohol and smoking has been my release. I need to find a better, safer way to break away from all the things keeping me hostage from a simple, short breath. Anyway, drugs are bad but I'm clearly not a poster child of innocence.
I keep telling people, do what makes you feel good. Even if it's for a minute or so. At least you can say that you feel happy. Not many people can say that. Unfortunately for me, my being happy is sex, drugs and alcohol. You guys need to stop being to concerned with how everyone sees you and you need to take some time for yourself. At the end of the day, you need to understand that people don't make you and they definitely shouldn't break you. You need to understand that you are not tied down to this earth, you are alone and you need to start doing things to make you feel nice. As harsh as it sounds, it's the truth. You were born alone and you'll die alone (unless you were in some mass suicide (can't help you then buddy)). You need to do things that make you happy. You only have one life; why live it to please others?
This is just coming from an intoxicated chick who feels that everyone is so stuffed with the problems surrounding them.
Personally, I don't care what anyone says about me. I've been told over and over again that it's not the good way to live, but you know what? I don't give a fuck. I strive for happiness and I will continue in my journey to find it. Happiness is amazing man. I swear. I 'd rather be happy than have a new car, house, etc. Stop living for others and live for yourself mannn.

Sincerely, Intoxicated Mouse. <3

Today, my name is Relief.

*sigh* I wish I could show you how good it feels to be without him. I feel like a new person; f r e e. I can breathe now. It's so.. good. I wouldn't have known what it feels like to be treated properly if I had continued with him. I now know what it is so be *dare I say it* happy.
A word seldom escaping from my mouth is now a feeling I can say I have. A feeling which mimics itself from the aura of another and flows throughout me, though it isn't constant, it is here. So surreal. I sit here allowing Chopin to sweep me off my feet and carry me into a world of an uttered euphoric feeling, rarely have I entered. Ne'er a time had the feeling of warm, 'liquid escape' creeping into my blood, nor clouded breaths emerging from my curved lips permitted genuine smiles...(t.b.c=))
In other news, I feel good. Good riddance to bad company.
POW!

Today, my name is Dolly.

This post is written mainly out of frustration. Why do people take me for a fool? Why do people think that behind my pretty face that it's an empty, thoughtless abyss?
Let me state, I am not a fucking idiot. Okay?
Let's put it this way, while you're sitting there playing your little childish games, I'm watching. I'm playing the same game you are, I played it before. I know the secret passages, the short cuts and any other fucking references you wanna throw in there. I'm not angry, don't get me wrong. It's not even funny or entertaining to me anymore. I'm just sick of the foolishness. It's 2009, you are of age; grow up. Tell me what you want from me and that will be it. Why you chose to take the long way around things beats me. I'm done with the games and the trivial pursuit. Come correct and 100 percent. *sigh* When will you people learn?
The one thing I find funny about this all, is why do you ask me why I don't call you, text you or why I don't chill with you? Honestly take a brief look at yourself and don't come to me with your stupidness. As I said earlier, I'm done with the games. When will you? It's ok though, I'll probably be gone by the time you decide to put down the controller.

C'est la vie. Life goes on with or without you.

Today, my name is M.I.A.

Well well well. It seems I have been quite absent and slacking in my duties to report my events and activities.

I'm really not too sure why I haven't been on much lately, but I'm back =)
*3 cheers for me!*
Any who, I've had sooo many things happen to me in the longest while and I just haven't thought to update you guys.. Sorry! So, I'm just going to try to update you guys quickly on the things that have happened to me in the past couple of months.

For starters, I NOW have my car. Although I still drive my moms, at least I can say I have one to call my own =).
My uncle gave it to me, and I am ever so grateful. It's not the newest car or the most recent model, but it does drive. I pride myself in having my car smelling like heaven and rainbows at all times!

My trip to Jamaica. I know half of you don't know, but I went to Jamaica for about a month in the summer for a vacation and to just spend some time with family members I haven't seen since I was 2. It was reaalllllyyy fun there, but I don't think I'll be leaving the country for a month ever again. I missed way too many things here.
One of the most interesting things that happened to me while I was there occured at a strip club. Long story short, I went to a strip club and the strippers seemed to admire my chest a little too much. As I was sitting beside my cousin watching them work the pole, a stripper named Rain made her way off the stage and onto my lap. Not only did I receive multiple free lap dances (BONUS!), but she insisted on tearing off my shirt and removing my uhh.. assets from their..nest. The entire club (and I mean everyone) was staring at my tits. That was a night to remember =)

September 15 2009, my godson Brayden Liam Smith was born. I was sooo excited and yet pissed. I had told my best friend to call me as soon and she went into labor because I really wanted to be there when he was born. Well, not IN the delivery room.. I wasn't trying to see all of that. I was in class and at around 12 pm, I receive a message from my blackberry informing me that Dana had sent me a message. It said 'I had him'. Now, what the fuck? lol.. I was so angry. I was going to leave my class and drive over to her house. I told her I was mad and she was laughing..lol.. She sent me a picture of that little heart breaker and I couldn't be mad anymore. I just hope I can be a good godmother!

And now we get into the bad shit.
I'm not gonna air my dirty laundry right now, but lets just say that family is just a word. I don't wanna hear any philosical bullshit on how family is the foundation of BLAH BLAH BLAH. Fuck it.
The way it stands right now, is if you don't live in my house, I don't give a fuck. I mean, yeah, there are certain family members who I love to death, but as for most of them, they can lick the inside of a public toilet clean with their tongue. If I were to see them on the street on fire, I wouldn't even spit on them. It's whatever though. Dee, Grimz & 23 I love you fuckers ^.^

Now that I remember... While I was in Jamaica, I asked my sister to do a couple little things for me.

1. Make sure no one goes in my room.
2. Take care of my pets.

That's all I asked. Now, making sure no one goes into my room seems easy.. right? I mean, I have my laptop in my room and she's in here all the time on it. If it were you, wouldn't you at least try to make the room seem presentable for when i get back? My garbage was flooding over, I had clothes all over the floor..Wait, no.. I left the clothes there..lol But got damn! At least take out my garbage. And now for my pets; I had 2 birds, 2 hamsters, 1 fish and 1 dog. To feed the birds and the hamsters, all you have to do is empty the container and refill it. To feed the fish, just put 4 pebbles in the tank every like 5 hours and she knew how to feed the dog. I came back home to an empty bird cage and to see a hamster half eaten.. WHAT THE FUCK. I asked her how the fuck she managed to kill most of my pets and her response was 'Well, at least your birds died together like they did in the Notebook'. How the hell are you gonna tell me that? lol I've had those birds for like 2 years! In regards to my hamsters, she said 'I was in your room yesterday and there were two'. Yes Rochelle, YESTERDAY! What the hell could she have done to my hamster in a day!? I went in to take out the dead hamster and noticed that my other hamster got a little hungry because she wasn't feeding them so my hamster decided to dine on the other one. I came back home to a purple fish tank...And I'm not talking about the tank itself. The water was purple... I don't even wanna know how or why. I couldn't even SEE through it to see if I still had a fish! Today, I have 1 dog, 1 fish and 1 hamster with herpes. Don't ask. I don't even know.

Yeesh, I'll leave it at that for now. I have plenty more to write but I don't wanna give you all nosebleeds from all this reading. One of these days, or probably later on today, I'm gonna write some shit that I've had on my mind for a while now but I'll give it a rest. I PROMISE to write regularly because I've had a few people come and talk to me, yelling at me because I haven't written anything since ..*looks to see when the last blog was posted* MAY!? WOOOW!!! Well, I'm back and there will be more of me to love =)

Mlle Mouse signing out!